Writing HS Admission Essays
By Nicole C. Kear
Part of what binds us New Yorkers together is shared dread. We dread the train being re-routed when we’re in a rush. We dread the traffic disaster that is the Five Borough Bike Tour. And we dread the NYC high school application process.
I’m not here to tell you not to dread it. I’ve been through it twice – once for myself, a long, long time ago, and for my son, who recently entered ninth grade. It is, as advertised, a time-sucking, stress-inducing, befuddling pain. That said, if you are open to being astounded, the array of high school choices in these five boroughs will astound you. Want to specialize in marine biology? Take your pick of programs. Want to study opera during your school day? There’s a school for that. Want a planetarium on the top floor? No problem. It can be easy to take the diversity of choices for granted, but, truly, it’s incredible. There were moments I even managed to feel grateful for the experience. I’ve never seen so much of New York City, and I’ve lived here all my life. It’s not all bad, is my point.
One of the parts of the application process that’s not so bad -- that might, in a different context, even be kind of cool -- is the personal essay. Not a lot of schools ask for an essay but the schools that do are some of the most popular and competitive ones. Now, I’m a memoir-writer and memoir-writing professor, so I may be biased, but this was the part of the process that excited me. And while I couldn’t even begin to explain the DOE algorithm that places kids in schools (trust me, I’ve tried), I do know a thing or two about telling personal stories. So, if your kids are applying to schools that ask for personal essays, here’s the advice I’d like to offer.
If this stumps your child, come at it from this angle: what do you think is cool about you – or what would someone who knows you well say is cool about you? There’s an exercise I like to do with my memoir-writing students which is helpful here, too. The renowned essayist Philip Lopate suggests that when writing about the self, we should start with your quirks -- those unusual traits or idiosyncrasies that set us apart from the rest. For my son, this was his esoteric and old-fashioned musical tastes. In my college applications, I wrote about my love of Edward Scissorhands. my obsession with the Vietnam War and my passion for sesquipedalian words. It’s just a way of getting to something honest and authentic about who we are.
A word of warning. Your child should resist the temptation to answer the question: what’s impressive about you? In a process as competitive as this one, with so many candidates vying for the same seats, there is, of course, the temptation to highlight accomplishments and use the essay as an extended resume. The problem is, this pushes readers away, and what the essay should do is pull them in. It also usually gets in the way of communicating who you uniquely are -- resumes, typically, sound very much the same.
Urge your child to open up, be honest, and get a little personal. I’m not talking about a scandalous tell-all -- a little authenticity goes a long way. This isn’t always the easiest thing for 13-year-olds to do (more on this in a minute) so It may take a few revisions to get to something personal. Along those lines, your child shouldn’t be afraid to write about a time they screwed up, a time they were embarrassed, a low point. These are frequently the times when we grow the most and often provide powerful glimpses into who we are.
It’s not rocket science, but writing a strong and memorable personal essay does take time and work. Something that hasn’t changed in the years since we went to middle school is this: social survival often necessitates the donning of a sturdy suit of armor. It’s something young teens get habituated to, and it’s not always easy for them to shed. To tell true, it’s not an easy process for any of us, even those that have left adolescence far behind. That said, I think it can be incredibly gratifying. No matter how old you are, it is liberating to tell your story, and be heard.
I’m not here to tell you not to dread it. I’ve been through it twice – once for myself, a long, long time ago, and for my son, who recently entered ninth grade. It is, as advertised, a time-sucking, stress-inducing, befuddling pain. That said, if you are open to being astounded, the array of high school choices in these five boroughs will astound you. Want to specialize in marine biology? Take your pick of programs. Want to study opera during your school day? There’s a school for that. Want a planetarium on the top floor? No problem. It can be easy to take the diversity of choices for granted, but, truly, it’s incredible. There were moments I even managed to feel grateful for the experience. I’ve never seen so much of New York City, and I’ve lived here all my life. It’s not all bad, is my point.
One of the parts of the application process that’s not so bad -- that might, in a different context, even be kind of cool -- is the personal essay. Not a lot of schools ask for an essay but the schools that do are some of the most popular and competitive ones. Now, I’m a memoir-writer and memoir-writing professor, so I may be biased, but this was the part of the process that excited me. And while I couldn’t even begin to explain the DOE algorithm that places kids in schools (trust me, I’ve tried), I do know a thing or two about telling personal stories. So, if your kids are applying to schools that ask for personal essays, here’s the advice I’d like to offer.
- Be real
If this stumps your child, come at it from this angle: what do you think is cool about you – or what would someone who knows you well say is cool about you? There’s an exercise I like to do with my memoir-writing students which is helpful here, too. The renowned essayist Philip Lopate suggests that when writing about the self, we should start with your quirks -- those unusual traits or idiosyncrasies that set us apart from the rest. For my son, this was his esoteric and old-fashioned musical tastes. In my college applications, I wrote about my love of Edward Scissorhands. my obsession with the Vietnam War and my passion for sesquipedalian words. It’s just a way of getting to something honest and authentic about who we are.
A word of warning. Your child should resist the temptation to answer the question: what’s impressive about you? In a process as competitive as this one, with so many candidates vying for the same seats, there is, of course, the temptation to highlight accomplishments and use the essay as an extended resume. The problem is, this pushes readers away, and what the essay should do is pull them in. It also usually gets in the way of communicating who you uniquely are -- resumes, typically, sound very much the same.
- Get personal
Urge your child to open up, be honest, and get a little personal. I’m not talking about a scandalous tell-all -- a little authenticity goes a long way. This isn’t always the easiest thing for 13-year-olds to do (more on this in a minute) so It may take a few revisions to get to something personal. Along those lines, your child shouldn’t be afraid to write about a time they screwed up, a time they were embarrassed, a low point. These are frequently the times when we grow the most and often provide powerful glimpses into who we are.
- Be specific
- Show growth:
It’s not rocket science, but writing a strong and memorable personal essay does take time and work. Something that hasn’t changed in the years since we went to middle school is this: social survival often necessitates the donning of a sturdy suit of armor. It’s something young teens get habituated to, and it’s not always easy for them to shed. To tell true, it’s not an easy process for any of us, even those that have left adolescence far behind. That said, I think it can be incredibly gratifying. No matter how old you are, it is liberating to tell your story, and be heard.